In my last post I started out writing about hockey and ended up talking about a dancer, much to the consternation of my brother whose life was pretty much always about that. He played hockey. . . my mother and my sister and I danced . . . it was tough on him . . . in the end, I became a hockey fan but  he’s still not a dance fan, so there you go. Actually, I don’t know why I said “there you go” because I have no idea what it proves. Maybe it just shows he was more traumatized by all the dancing than I was from all the hockey. Or I’m just more open-minded than he is. Yeah! I’ll stick with that one!

Okay, so the point of all this is that the post prompted a comment from my good friend and neighbor, Harriet Brown, who said what we really need is a Poetry Bus. And you know what? WE TOTALLY NEED A POETRY BUS! And I know exactly what it should look like and what it should have in it, and where it should go, and what sort of programs it should offer, and what the driver should look like . . . but I’m hyperventilating. As always.

Here’s the idea:

  1. The whole outside should be covered with those little magnetic words that you use on your refrigerator. Then people can turn the poetry bus into an ever-changing poem! Except that then washing the bus would be a real pain, so let’s make it that the outside is just painted to look like it’s covered with magnetic words, and the whole INSIDE would be covered with the actual magnets. Except then there’d be no room for books and other stuff, so instead it should have huge, framed magnetic boards that fasten to the outside for use when you’re driving around or hanging out in parking lots having poetry days, but can be stored inside when the thing is parked for the night. Or maybe I’ll should settle for a box of poetry magnets for prizes because:
  2. The bus will actually be an RV with an awning that pops out of the side and doubles as a stage, so that the Poetry Bus can hold Mobile Poetry Slams! No—better yet—a double-decker tour bus! The whole top can be like a little theater, with seats and everything! And tour buses have built-in sound systems, so you don’t even have to buy a microphone and speakers! And the slam winners will get packets of poetry magnets! To stick on the bus!
  3. This would be the schedule: Doggerel Days and Limerick Lunches at random times for those of us who like silly things. Then there will be Sestina Saturdays, Sonnet Sundays, Tanka Tuesdays, Villanelle Vendnesdays, Terse Verse Thursdays (otherwise known as Haiku Heaven), and Free Verse Fridays. Mondays will be a day off because even poets need a break. And I can’t think of a poetry form that works with “Monday.”  Of course, there could be Magnetic Monday . . . for doing poetry on the magnetic boards.
  4. The bus will drive to schools in the district and commandeer recess time, offer a lunchtime option, and/or give the school librarian a helping hand. Then, for the grown-up poets and readers there can be public library parking lot hours . . . state fairs, art fairs, cultural fairs . . . the collection could even change depending on the fair! Got a Polish Festival going on? Fill the bus with polish poets and pierogis! Celtic Festival? Yeats and ale! Black History Month: A Poet a Day – Phillis Wheatley to Tupac Shakur! But for National Poetry Day the bus will go into hiding, just to be contrarian.
  5. You need a special license to drive a bus, and librarians probably don’t have those licenses. But since librarians can’t get jobs now they’re probably applying for all sorts of jobs they never thought they’d try, so why not bus driver?! The ideal bus driver will be quite mature and have a highly developed sense of responsibility (ideally the driver will be a middle-aged woman with at least one child), should look non-threatening (white hair is vastly preferable), should have an MSLIS degree (preferably with a BA in English) . . . well, will you look at that . . . I just described myself!
  6. There should be comfy chairs and lamps. And it needs mobile wifi so that when someone is hit on the head by the muse of poetry he/she can write the thing down on the poetry bus’s very own social networking site so all can be dazzled by the brilliance of the denizens of the poetry bus!

Poetry bus needs a name. Poems on the Move? Words To Go? Verses versus Vehicle? I’m open to suggestions. Rhymes on the Road? Driving the Double Dactyl? Seriously . . . a little help, here!